I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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