you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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