I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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