Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
