Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Randomize
