Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
