so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize