hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
