i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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