i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Randomize
