Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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