That's intense
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
it's great music for shaving your balls
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
