i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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