Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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