You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
