so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
