never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
