at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
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