its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize