Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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