I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Randomize
