I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Randomize
