i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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