My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Randomize
