I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
