My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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