So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
