I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Nobody cheats on THIS.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
