So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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