if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Randomize