Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize
