I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Woke up backwards on a recliner
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