I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
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