Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
