That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
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