She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize