Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
