Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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