just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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