he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
