why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize