I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
