i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
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