you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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