I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
