i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
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