I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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