so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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