Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
