so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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