Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize